Marriage, it’s a choice

I have wanted to write about marriage for a while so what better time to do it than when Tiger Woods is all over the news?

Let’s set the foundation.  Marriage is an institution promoted by governments to not only collect income tax from the profits generated in all the cost involved in the wedding, but also promote the idea of “family” to create stability and sustain population.  These are efforts to ensure the government has enough revenue to be self sustaining.  For those reasons, the government created more than 1,000 legal rights for married couples to promote the behavior of getting married. (refer to my other posts for other examples of where the government changes behavior through legislation)

In addition, the origin of “marriage” is not as sacred as people want to believe.  The original purpose of “marriage” was basically for a man to secure a woman as his property, so that no other man can claim her.  This country has “refined” it, if you will, based on this culture’s values, but there are some cultures that do not treat marriage the same way we do (Arabs for example).  Do not be closed minded and believe that America’s definition of a marriage is the universal definition or that’s it is even the right definition.  There are cultures that allow polygamy and there are others that allow the husbands to cheat but not vice versa so the definition is not universal.  If you look in the history, there are countless examples of men having more than one wife when they are wealthy, even in developed countries.  Therefore, speaking of “marriage” as a sacred institution is just retarded because it is no more sacred than anything else man has created.

Enough of the background, the question is what is the purpose of getting married in America? Here are some of the responses I have heard over the years.

A. The most retarded, yet frequent, responses include the words “love” and “commitment”.

How does informing the government via the marriage license registration process have anything to do with love?  Do you mean to say you cannot commit or love someone without signing a piece of legal document that binds you two in a partnership? (and I do mean partnership as in a business relationship so look it up if you don’t know what it means)  If you don’t think your relationship can stay forever without the threat that one person will take half of the other person’s belongings or the deterrent of legal paper works that it takes to get divorced, then you probably shouldn’t be in that relationship.

If you are committed to another person, what’s the point of telling the government about it?  If you will love this person unconditionally, what’s the point of filling out paperwork at the local registrar recorder’s office?  What do they have to do with your “love” and “commitment”?  Why can’t you just be by each other’s side for the rest of your lives without involving the government?

That’s what I thought.

B.  Responses that include the words, “pension”, “tax benefit”, “inheritance exemption”, “insurance”, etc.

As I mentioned before, the government has set up more than a thousand legal rights for legally married couple.  Therefore, this is the only valid response, to say that the purpose of getting married is for the legal benefits.  However, I cannot stress more on the fact that this is the ONLY valid reason to be married, to not be excluded from a large set of benefits that the government put aside for married couples.

This is the reason why gays and lesbians fight for same-sex marriage.  They want to have the benefits of a married couple.  There’s no law to prevent anyone from having a same-sex ceremony or a wedding reception because it’s your money to spend.  So why is the gay and lesbian community so caught up on making it “official”?  A union can be “official” the moment you proclaim to your family and friends that you plan to spend the rest of your life with a certain individual.  Why is it important that you tell the government?  Oh that’s right, for the legal benefits associated with an “official” marriage.

C. Responses that include the word “religion” or implies religion.

You cannot argue one made-up institution with another made-up institution because then you would have to prove the validity of the latter (refer to previous post about religion).  It’s the equivalent of me saying “I’m right about X because I wrote a book about how right I am and X was in it.  So just read the book, you’ll see that I am right about X.”  Freakin’ retard.

D. Responses that include the words, “vows” and “ceremony”.

When has the vow ever meant anything?  Certainly it doesn’t mean anything in the current society.  Surely you jest when you believe that a vow will secure your marriage any more than that ring on your finger.  I am sure it meant the world at the time you said it, but all you have to do is look at the divorce rates in America.  If love is supposed to be everlasting and unconditional, how do you reach irreconcilable differences in more than half of the marriages in America?  Vows are supposed to be kept regardless of what happens, through thick and thin.  Right?

Look at Tiger Woods, even having one of the most beautiful women in the world as a wife did not stop him from wanting strange ass.  This shouldn’t come as a surprise when you consider that even Hale Berry and Jessica Alba have been cheated on.  The biggest mistake Tiger ever made was to get married in the first place, the next was to cheat, and the next was to get caught.  It is not right to cheat on his wife, but he should have thought about his choice of lifestyle before getting married.

Conclusion?

Marriage is not for everyone, just as it was clearly not for Tiger Woods.  Do not fall for the government propaganda and societal pressure.  Make your own informed decision and make sure you educate yourself about marriage first.  Most important thing of all, understand the consequences to a marriage and stop thinking that you are the exception to the rule or that your relationship is unlike any others.  That’s what everyone thinks before they get divorced a couple years later and become one of the statistics, and in this country it is more than one out of two marriages end in divorce.

The point of the article is not to discourage marriages because as I pointed out earlier, marriage provides a lot of legal benefits.  A marriage DOES NOT GUARANTEE ANYTHING except for legal benefits so it should be treated as such.  The point is to understand clearly at the time you get married what these legal benefits are and how they weigh against the consequences of a legal partnership labeled “marriage”.

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4 responses to “Marriage, it’s a choice

  1. I agree with the marriage comments. It is one of the reasons I favor gay marriage rights — so that gay people who have committed to one another for the long haul can have the same legal rights as straights. What gets a bug up my butt is when nonmarried straights live together and want the same legal protections w/o entering into a legal contract. I have a BIL who is like this. I don’t see why a couple that lives together should get rights but not roomates, since the only difference seems to be sex. And what company gives the same benefits to part-timers and independent contractors over full-time workers? Just seems wrong to me.

  2. i totally agree with this article, since i was a little kid i never wanted to get married (for some stupid reasons like “to have a husband” doesn’t sound as cool as “to have a boyfriend”) but even now when i’m 16 i haven’t changed my mind. and the thing is that my family (ASIAN) thinks “oh you’re only 16 you don’t know anything about life, you’ll see one day and you’ll understand”. but all i can think about is how people can take advantage of everything, and not just simply live life simply, the way you want to live it and not think about how others people might look at you. i don’t expect my family to have the same point of view as mine, but i’d really appreciate if they could just understand and respect it…

    ps. i have a question for you. my cousin and her boyfriend decided to get married recently, after 2 years of a serious relationship. the thing that annoys me is that she’s not ready yet, she told me she’s doing this for him since he’s already 30 (she’s 23) and that his family expects him to get married before it’s too late. the fact that she must be in such a hurry, scarifying her whole life (okay i’m maybe exaggerating but you know what i mean) just seems wrong to me. i mean it is her choice after all, but well… i just don’t want her to live in regret years later. what do you think?

    • uncensoredinsight

      Kid, first of all, you do sound mature for being only 16. Here’s a tip, you have to earn respect and until you do, your parents will see you as a little baby. Forget how they feel about your view on marriage and concentrate on making sound decisions. Eventually, they will come around when they believe you know what you are doing with your life.

      To address your question, the chances are your cousin’s marriage will end in disaster. Am I certified or qualified to make such a statement? No, but the cards are stacked against her because:
      1. Her age, she will go through a lot of changes in her values and mindset in her twenties.
      2. His parents were the driving force for the marriage, not him
      3. She was getting married because of the circumstances, not because she felt ready.
      This is not saying the marriage is destined to fail, but that the odds are against her so good luck to your cousin.

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